The Official Alien Abductee's Handbook

By Joe Tripician

Extraterrestrials evidently have seeped into our realization. ultimately, in a hilarious send-up of self-help manuals, Emmy Award-winning writer Joe Tripician fearlessly tackles the entire spectrumaliens, UFOs, precise believers, executive deceptions and different issues paranormal. Peppered with proof, conspiracies, opinion, and occasions too very good to not be made up (but aren't).

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This ethically challenged fish fry happens in zone fifty one (also often called Groom Lake, Dreamland, Paradise Ranch, and where the place Uniformed males Come to Take You Away in the event you Wander Too Close). Funded to the music of $22 billion plus as a part of the federal government's "black funds" (and i do not suggest army minstrel shows), Groom Lake has produced such super-secret guns because the U-2 undercover agent airplane and the F-117A "stealth" fighter-bomber. yet it isn't simply the parade of overpriced jock toys that brings alien ship watchers there nightly. it's rumored that, deep within the bowels of this complicated of hangars and radar dishes, past the world's longest runway, nestled at the back of the swimming pool, bowling alley, bars, and X-rated motion picture lounges frequented through army brass and fighter jockeys, is the inner most mystery our executive has ever lied approximately. No, no longer the particular price of a Pentagon hammer, yet genuine alien spacecraft. the following most sensible army scientists purportedly disassemble recovered alien craft to unearth the secrets and techniques of alien ship expertise (including, one hopes, the machine that enables extraterrestrial beings to fly at once over U. s. army installations at speeds exceeding fifty five mph with no as soon as being pulled over). eleven' if you happen to bought this as a unfastened PDF, please tip the writer and donate at: http://joetrip. com/ But all isn't really good in Dreamland. And the govt, once more, is blamed for utilizing the canopy of Ufology to hide its nefarious, unlawful, and downright stinky shenanigans. The lawsuit names the safeguard division, the Air strength, and the nationwide defense corporation, all which in the beginning denied the very lifestyles of region fifty one. Then lawyer Jonathan Turley threatened to publish declassified Soviet satellite tv for pc photographs to end up its life. Turley, who works for the Washington-based Environmental Crimes undertaking, blames the Environmental defense business enterprise for no longer tracking waste disposal on the facility. The EPA, for its half, first acknowledged it may well no longer implement the legislation at an install that doesn't exist. It now grudgingly admits having just recently "inventoried" the Groom Lake facility. {"Let's see, that is 2,034 empty fifty-five-gallon drums, 113 spent rocket gas cannisters, and 59,023 bins of bar fits. "} in line with mounting public knowledge and this fresh lawsuit, the govt. ultimately capitulated and did what it needed to do--seize 4 thousand acres of public land surrounding quarter 51-in the identify of nationwide safeguard, in fact. And if this modem Machiavellian stream manages to maintain us from having a look in, we will basically think the frightful, untold secrets and techniques that stay hidden. examine contemporary American historical past: the Atomic power fee experimenting on unsuspecting americans within the '4Os, the CIA engaging in LSD experiments on unsuspecting american citizens within the '60s, and who is aware what form of Mengeleinspired experiments the army subjected unsuspecting American infantrymen to in the course of barren region typhoon. ask yourself why they name it nationwide defense? since it is simple to nationally safe a disinformed and diseased population-and even more uncomplicated to gather their taxes.

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